A letter

Archive for the ‘Landing’ Category

Our imaginary Christmas card…and vomit…

In Landing on January 4, 2012 at 9:15 pm

Well, as I have come to find out, most things in life don’t go as planned.  It’s neither good nor bad, just life I guess.  Sometimes it’s great they don’t, occasionally it’s sad, and most of the time it’s good.  Us not sending out a Christmas card falls under the sad category.  I think in our whole married life of 7 Christmases we have only successfully sent out one card and photo combo.  Depressing!!! In my perfect world, we would have one for each year showing how our family has changed, how we have gradually gained weight, and we would eventually frame them etc.  The one year we did take a photo, with Chubbs (he was the lucky “child” that has made face-space in our one send out) we only sent out about half of them due to address collection.  I found the sealed, named, yet address-less cards when we packed up the house.  Oh well, I should probably let it go, but it’s just plain depressing in my opinion.  We took a great photo this year, the boys had matching fur lined hats with ear flaps that snap under the chin, and David and I had complete fur hats, mine creamish, his blackish, of the same sort.  At least we have the photo, you can just imagine how amazing it looked in your head and imagine my  kind words to you as well, that I wrote in the most cheery card you have ever received.

There, now that that is out of the way, how was Christmas?  Ours was splendid minus sicknesses surrounding.  Poor Sol baby, after 2 recent ear infections, and a continual snotty nose the last month or two, he also had to get Leon’s nasty cough.  Both boys were not at the top of their game going to NY, but we had  a wonderful time anyhow.  They practically have an entire toy store in their room now, and many a new pair of jeans and shoes thanks to Grandma and Grandpa, and Grammy and PeePaw. I think we may have every “battle guy”, and action figure known to man kind now.  Leon has a “Spidy” mask, and “Cap” mask, (Spider Man and Captain America incase you didn’t follow) complete with shield, and a cape and a eye cape companion (not sure what the little slit eye hole mask device is called).  We can battle the universe at our house.  So if ever, you need assistance in your life, call us up, we’ll be on our way.  Leon turned 3 in NY as well, and Mom threw him a birthday party with kids from their church.  It was fantastic to see his little mind absorbing this all.  Hilariously, on the morning of his birthday, we awoke to find the entire box of cupcakes on the floor in a pile, several missing frosting and a stained Leon face.  I guess he couldn’t wait for cake till later.  I still can’t believe we have a 3 year old.  Where has time gone.  We found a video of him when I was just a few months pregs with Solie.  There is some crazy song out there that says “fat guy in a little coat”.  (this is none of my doing, I repeat, none of my doing)  He somehow heard this song and used to sing it.  He also used to say for weeks after “thats a fat guy” having no idea what it meant.  In this video he was saying that phrase and we would say “who is a fat guy?”  He paused and then proceeded to say, “Maggie is”.  We died watching this video. He’s grown up so much and is still such a character.

David and I enjoyed some much needed us time over break.  I forgot what it was like to share life with my best friend on a daily basis.  How I miss him. It’s a rough adjustment back to my solo world, but at least this time I know we can do it.  We got in a couple of dates and just enjoyed time together as a fam with the boys.  It was the first time ever in my life that I didn’t see any of my family over Christmas or New Years.  So strange.  I miss them so dearly.  Sigh. Thankfully, we’ve been married a while and Engelhardt traditions feel like Christmas to me now too.  Minus the snow (grrr…NY) we had such a wonderful trip home.

Sol is proudly standing up to furniture and scaring us half to death with his bravery.  Days after learning to crawl, I was giving Leon a bath and didn’t think twice about it beign a danger for our bath-loving Solie. I went to get a change of clothing for toots and came back to find Sol standing side the tub reaching in.  I about died.  He’s learning at a rapid pace keeping me on my toes.  He’s such a doll!!! Amazing what the second child can get away with.  Eating big boy food (I didn’t let Leon because of the mess until 18 months, HA), battling, missing naps, and the list could go on.   Scary to think what child number 3 will be doing eventually (no that doesn’t mean anything, just thinking ahead).   It’s a miracle kids survive the dangers of growing up. Parents too for that matter 🙂 We ended our trip with a glorious event of the stomach flu.  Forty minutes into our 12 hour trip home, Leon vomited all over the universe. We forged ahead and were praising God for a new carseat already awaiting us at home.  We gladly chucked the old one for unsaid, but clearly imaginable reasons. This also meant canceling Bonte’, Lee, Luke and Alex coming for my b-day and New Years, but God must have known we needed a few days down before round 2 began.  Though sad, we got some real downtime and felt ready to take on this next semester.  My man makes me proud.  I guess you could say he passed with flying colors.  Many a happy dances were done at the Engelhardt abode.  I feel like I passed too, not necessarily with flying colors, but still, passed.  I do have children that still love me, a hubs that still loves me, and my Jesus, who is at my side through it all and Loves me more than I can comprehend.  That is something to chew on and that is what I will take in to my 2012.  Love you dearly.  Hoping you had a wonderful time the past month or so. To this newest year!

Always, Bep

12 things…and Christmas…

In Landing on December 8, 2011 at 6:58 pm

It’s that time of year, when…different strokes for different folks.  Hopefully everyone falls in love like the song says, but if one has already fallen in love, like me, it’s that time of year when many things take place in our hectic lives.  Here are twelve random things in our lives this Christmas season, cause random is how my brain works.  One:  In Leon’s world, Christmas lights are “Christmas time”.  After Bonte’ and I put up the tree, and Leon awoke to it the next morning, he exclaimed “It’s Christmas Time!!!!”  I was delighted he remembered.  After all, he was not quite 2 last Christmas.  But, then again, he is our child that at 18 months told me on the way to church on a rainy day that told me “the clouds were sad….they were crying”.  I guess I shouldn’t be too surprised that he remembered, but it still made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside to see such wide eyed wonder at Christmas lights. I wish it was still that simple for us adults.  One spot on the tree is a tad bare in the lights department, he said, “there is no Christmas time right here”.  Also, each and every day, he asks if it is time for Christmas, and wonders if we are going to Grandma and Grandpa’s yet.  Our answer every day is “in a couple weeks”, which isn’t necessarily true, since each day it is one less than the day before.  But, it is a sufficient answer for our almost 3.  Two:  Whether it feels like Christmas or not, Christmas is coming.  This year has felt like ‘or not’ to me.  Two days ago I was in shorts and capris, sweating to death on a walk.  UGH! Oh well.  During Christmas time for an almost 3 year old, many things suddenly relate to Christmas.  I have overheard him telling friends that some very old, legless, headless battle guy was his ‘wary’ special present from Christmas.  The usually older friend, stares sort of strangely at the toy in wonder that such a present could be in fact special, and from Christmas.  Hmmmm….like I said before, different strokes for different folks.  For leon, this is all part of getting in the Christmas spirit, tying everything back to Christmas. I am trying to do the same.  Three: Though in my inner heart I would like to be Emily from The Jones Design Company, I am not.  None the less I shall bake something to feel like Christmas is coming and in this case, for this year, dad’s favorite were our baking adventure recipe.  Butter cookies with Chocolate.  I wouldn’t say it was exactly a success, or a failure, but it was something that baked in our oven and was edible.  Leon and I had a baking party tonight complete with a living room dance party to Michael Buble’s Christmas album.  Sol loves a good dance party too.  Four: Solie is a trooper!!! He is finishing his 2nd round of antibiotic for his 2nd ear infection in 20 days.  Poor baby.  It’s been a month of intermittent sleep for both of us and a very miserable baby.  This round of meds is really taking a toll on his tummy and on top of teething we are not sure he could have that much more going on.  He is one sweet boy though, and though we know he isn’t himself, to everyone around him he is one happy-go-lucky-baby.  He is our bub-a-rub and our Sol-bee.  We are so thankful he made it though Whooping cough this year, and couldn’t imagine if he hadn’t.  We love him to the moon and back, or in Leon’s version of the saying…”love him to toys”. (a much more valuable item to love someone to in his world). We are hoping for a healthy sleeping baby over our Christmas break! Five: Leon just got out of bed for the umpteenth time tonight, and while I would love to be seething with anger right now, since Sol goes into a crying fit each and every time he comes out of their shared room, I am holding back laughter.  While nursing Sol back to sleep for the 3rd time tonight, Leon showed up in the hall, squinty eyed….”I fell out of bed, (pause) I fell out of bed this year, and got hurt rearry bad, on my belly”.  Hmm….this year huh?  His confusion of time and days, is hilarious.  He often confuses minutes with hours, and wants to “eat chips or something  for a couple more hours”.  He often upon waking up, or I should say getting up from the so-called nap time, says…”I had a great nap mom.  It was a short one, but it was rearry great.”  In his most recent telling of his “great nap” he also added, “I was dreaming about batman, and bad guys….” Oh Leon, one thing we can’t say about him is that he is lacking words or imagination!  Six: Six days until Christmas break…The land of finals is upon us.  We can hardly believe it.  Two down, three to go. I couldn’t be more proud of my man.  He has weathered this first semester with triumph!  I can tell, I am already letting down, which also makes me realize how much I have not been let down until now.  Almost every day this week, I have not exercised, not made anything exciting for dinner, not really gotten ready for the day, and eaten way too many sweets. I am tired, and looking forward to Christmas break.  If I am like this, and I am not the student, then he must really be ready for it.  It is a relief to know we can do it, have done it, have made it though this chunk of school.  The unknown has been conquered, and the satisfaction and comfort of looking back and seeing we are here now is, indescribable. Seven:  Our parenting is paying off.  Leon does hear the things we say, though at times it seems he is deaf to our words.  We frequently are telling him the difference between men and women, their descriptors, and titles and such.  While listening to a worship song in the car the other day, whose chorus repeats “Jesus you’re beautiful” time and time again, I heard Leon from the back seat, “mom?, they are saying Jesus is beautiful”.  I responded emphatically,  “he is and we love Him so much”.  He then responded, “Jesus is not beautiful, he is not a girl, he does not have any dresses, he is not a princess!!!”.  I was at a loss, he was right.  Rather than try to explain the beauty of the Lord to a 3 year old, I told him he was correct and that Jesus was handsome.  That will work for now.  The hilarity of regurgitation and its settings. Eight: I can hardly wait for Christmas in New York with David’s family.  I am praying for snow, snow, snow.  Paul and Deanna will be home from Hawaii this year too, which will be the best.  Nine: I am nesting.(and no I am not pregnant.)  You know how I am when I get fixated on things.  Right now, I am in this “making our house a home” craze.  I am constantly, and I mean constantly, (what else is a law wife to do) looking for throw pillows, curtain and pillow material, lamps, blankets etc. to make this apartment feel like home. Though the funds to purchase such things are not exactly a reality, I none the less am having the time of my life looking and scheming ways to frugally make this happen.  It fills my time at night whilst the hubs is studying and makes me just as happy as can be.  The world of Pinterest is amazing I might add, simply amazing.  Ten: I adore online shopping simply because I LOVE getting packages in the mail (even getting deodorant in the mail is fun).  Eleven: People can’t be replaced.  No matter how many wonderful new people we meet, and love, and build memories with, your heart still aches for those left behind you.  So much was about to take place last time this year.  Lately, I miss the boys.  Nothing quite like a blazing fire in our beautiful little house by a lit Christmas tree playing scrabble with Esamy and Bub.  Or, which was more common, making dinner for my house full of men, on a cold and snowy night.  I remember our small pre- Christmas, family Christmas last year.  Esamy got a new brown leather Hebrew-Greek study Bible, Luke Got a Popeye dvd, and we got an amazing coffee grinder which is used daily and makes me smile.  Sigh. How I miss those times, I really do.  Twelve:  I am grateful. It has not been an easy year, but it has been good.  It’s been full of fears, and triumphs, full of many goodbyes, and some hellos.  It’s been a year of losses, yet we have much to be thankful for.  It’s been stretching, and daunting, and down right difficult at times, but we have come through clothed in grace, that fits us perfectly.  It’s been sort of wonderful to have a different perspective on Christmas this year.  A year not focused on presents, and things, but on a gift that leaves us speechless in spite of ourselves.  A gift that is far to lofty for us, that is humbling to receive, a gift we know we can’t repay, from a giver that doesn’t expect you to do so.  This gift leaves my eyes welled up with tears, as I contemplate just how blessed we are.  Merry Christmas.  Merry Christmas.

Bep






Out of the mouth of Leon…and a 3 day menu…

In Landing on November 28, 2011 at 1:18 pm

Leon, as you know, never ceases to amaze us.  He and I have been having a few conversations regarding thankfulness.  He gets the concept mainly, I think.  After our first conversation about it, we took turns saying things we were thankful for.  He had quite a list including “Go-wi-waf” (Goliath in regular English) and bad guys.  Sort of odd, but in the world of an almost 3 year old, trained warrior at that, perfectly sensible.  Bonte’, Lee and Bub made the 6 hour trip here for Thanksgiving!  We almost had as much fun planning the menu for the 3 days they were here as we did during the actual trip.  I can assure you, my 5 lb weight loss prior to Thanksgiving has most definitely been negated. O well! They brought us the best Christmas present ever, by showing up at our balcony slider with a Christmas tree, stand, and lights.  I almost cried with Joy.  Christmas with no tree is pretty much not like Christmas at all.  Bonte’ also brought Christmas crafts and we  had a cheery ball making our home festive for the holidays.  Nothing like having a sister in town, nothing like it at all. We had a meat and cheese platter with garlic oil crostinis, homemade apple chutney, and olive tapenade the first night they arrived.  So stinking good!  I think I should have been born in France!  God was on to something when he thought up cheese.  The next morning called for French press coffee, southern ham, and biscuits.  Oh my.  Homemade biscuits at that!  Devine.  Our afternoon snack was a sinful mix of french brie, browned butter, toasted walnuts with cinnamon, and brown sugar, baked in a shell of puff pastry and eaten with crackers.  Not sure what we were thinking when we planned such a rich dish as the appetizer, but thoroughly enjoyed it and were full to the brim.  It was good our Turkey took an hour longer to cook, so that our appetites could return to semi-normal before indulging in the main course for Thanksgiving day. Fig, sausage and rosemary stuffing, mom’s rolls, garlic and sea salt french beans, goat cheese and arugula blackened carrots, orange cranberry sauce, mashers and the most amazing turkey ever wrapped in a butter soaked cheese cloth, stuffed with the most amazing assortment of delacacies. Chocolate Pecan pie, Pecan pie and Ma-maws pumpkin pies were for dessert.  It was just a perfect time all around.  So wonderful to be with family and so much to be thankful for.  We wanted to go around the table and share things we each were thankful for.  Leon started.  “I’m thankful for toys and fruit” he began. “I’m thankful for candy! For fish and sharks. For Candy! (2nd time)” Then he paused and said, “That’s all the things I’m thankful for!” There was not one of us that were not holding back gut busting laughter and we were just filled with delight!  What a cutie pie.  He was then going around giving hugs before bed.  While hugging Uncle Lee, he gushed, “you are the best guy ever”.  Again, all of us were holding back laughter, and smiling ear to ear.  When he got to Uncle Bub, he said while hugging  him, “you’re my hero”.  At this point, I was trying not to cry.  Such a little, guy with such meaningful, thoughtful things to say.  We all were astounded and it left us thinking about how blessed we really are.  I don’t think we could have had a better Thanksgiving.  God is amazing and has richly blessed us.  I am thankful for my boys.  They are our delight.  I am thankful for my sweet loving, husband who is my best friend.  I am thankful for family that lives close and most of all for a God who is patient with me, and loving to me.

With an overflowing heart….

Bep

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Stopping to ponder the good….

In Landing on November 17, 2011 at 7:13 pm

Giving of thanks. That is what I shall think about, and what I shall call this grand day of Thanksgiving. Even in a time, when the more-than-enough provision of the Lord seems scarce at times, I have chosen to be thankful. His provision is never shy, it’s often my perspective that comes up just a bit short.  He is always showing up on time, with things I had not thought of and plenty of what I had thought of.  God is probably laughing at me, and my stress over things that really don’t matter. I have been daily thinking of things that I am thankful for. I am overjoyed that my big and only big sis came to visit. Such a grand time. I can’t remember sharing a bed since she got married, though we used to for some 18 odd years. So fun. We pinterested and drooled over household wants until we were a soaking wet mess of inspiration. What fun. Grateful that Bonte’, Lee and Luke live in the same time zone. Thankful for Lizzy Daz’s Law school-fall-survival package. I kid you not, her festive counter spray was the sole reason I hand washed my kitchen floor. (it’s sort of a counter right?) I am thankful for random fallen trees in our mini forrest that provided me a grandeur wreath for the holidays. I am thankful for my amazing double stroller that is used daily and a life saver in this law school season. I rejoice over our amazing families and love and memories surrounding each one. I’m thankful for the little things: finding a new kitchen rug at Ross, getting an early birthday present, Solie’s new found talent of crawling, Leon’s new grown hair that can now stand on end, New friends to be learned, old ones to be enjoyed, throw pillows in absurd numbers, random objects to be smiled at and egg nog lattes that can now be made for cheap using Via!!!! I am also thankful for Thanksgiving plans with Bonte’, Lee and Luke. I am also head over heals in love with the man of my dreams, and couldn’t be more thankful for him! Most of all, I am thankful for someone like Jesus, who, while in this wretched state loves me ever so tenderly. Someone who actually delights in me, despite my shortcomings which are too many to count. Instead I will count my blessings. They are many. All my selfishness, and mishaps and less than lovely-nesses are forgiven. They are washed away into a sea where, though one could choose to remember them, does not ever recall them. If deep gratitude cannot well up upon such a thought, I am not sure if any thought could muster gratitude at all. Though I miss everyone deeply, and so wish I could be home, I am abundantly blessed!

Bep


Southerners…

In Landing on November 1, 2011 at 7:03 pm

Southern living, in the fall, is a whole new cup of tea, iced tea I might add.  I keep pinching myself today, saying, “it’s November”.  Praise the Lord Starbucks just started serving eggnog lattes, which should help remedy my non-holiday feeling a bit.  It was 64 today and sunny.  I have all of our winter wear out, organized and we will wear it even if we sweat to death.  I love sweaters, and scarfs, and boots.  I refuse, and I repeat, refuse to we are socks with flip flops.  (yes, I have seen it a time or ten on a rainy cold day, and I am not a fan)  I probably have enough boots for half of virginia beach, and carefully plan each day’s outfits so I can at least wear all my favorite stuff before its 100 degrees again.  I have to say though, a few of the trees are changing  color now, and I think by Christmas it should feel very holiday-ish.  (here’s to hoping) We have a law-wives mom and kid play date every Friday morning at the Village playground.  Normally around 15 mom’s and their tagalongs show up.  So coffee in hand, half-bundled we headed out to the park.  As we got closer I thought to myself, “is it Friday?”. Not a soul was in sight.  This 50 degree weather had scared away all the Southerners.  I was shocked.  We weren’t even in coats yet, just sweaters.  That is when I realized I am a true NW gal.  The colder the better, and if you ask Luke or Esam, when it’s dreary and wet, it’s high time for an “adventure”. Last year when they had to mow in the snow/sleet/rain/mixture, I spent many a minutes trying to convince them how fun it would be.  I suggested wearing ski gear, wearing many layers, drinking hot coffee or cocoa.  At the time they didn’t think it was funny and now I will never hear the end of it.  But, that is how I view it.  Brisk weather calls for snuggling up, bundling up and creating some memories.  Hopefully it will be brisk enough to do all of those things here.  Only time will tell.  We got matching chin strap, fur lined hats for the boys, and David and I got entirely fur, chin strap hats in attempts to take a great family photo.  The photo was a disaster, at least on take one, but the hats, sure make it feel more like winter.  The boys look adorable and cannot possibly get sick wearing them here.  Anything that makes it feel more like home, right?

Speaking of the boys, they are growing like weeds in this warm fall weather.  Literally! Like weeds.  Solie went straight out of 6 months stuff into 12-18 month stuff overnight!  He is a chunk of 22 lbs.  He is entirely mobile without crawling.  So funny.  He can swivel and scoot every which way.  Any day now he should be making me chase him round the house.  I am looking forward to the extra work out, but dreading it at the same time.  I know he will keep me on my toes when he’s a movin’. Leon is cute as ever, also growing like a weed.  He is non stop “warior-ing” all day long.  He told David the other morning, “you are the biggest, strongest, warrior dad I have ever seen”.  Squishable.  And, at least once a day, he looks at me and says, “mom your beautiful”.  He’s a keeper, and God must have known I’d need to hear that in this crazy time in life, when at least Leon can appreciate the outfit I put on in the afternoon, eh-hem, I mean morning. (wink)

Well, wishing we could go grab an eggnog latte. Have one and think of me.

Love you dearly,

Bep

One twelfth…

In Landing on October 15, 2011 at 6:07 pm

Fall break is upon us!!!!  Nothing has felt this great in a long time.  David told me yesterday, that one twelfth of Law School is done already.  Hard to imagine.  This has been one long twelfth!  I think it feels more like a year has gone by, but still a relief that a chunk of law is under David’s belt and that we are weathering this season in decent shape.  David is rocking Law School.  I could’t be more proud of my non-typical, lawyer husband.  I think he is one of a kind in his class and is loving school more than he thought he would.  We normally commence each crazy week with our Sabbath.  This means that from 5pm on Friday, to just after dinner on Saturday we do absolutely nothing relating to school or housework and just try to enjoy the time together.  I always began to slip into a slight depression when late afternoon begins to say hello on Saturday, somehow wishing it could last just a while longer.  It never does.  Today however, is different.  I am not sure if a day has felt like such a long time ever in my life.  We are in heaven.  We went to the beach today and spent hours walking in 75 degree weather, our toes in the sand.  We took a long drive, didn’t worry about naps, came home and made the absolute best home-made, double pepperoni pizza and have a movie and chocolates on the docket for later this evening.  Both boys are in bed and we spent much of the day battling Leon and kissing Sol.  Amazing what a few hours will do for the soul and it’s not even Monday.  I think it’s now that we realize just how insane Law School really is for both he and I.  It’s go, go, go, go, go, go, go, blink twice on our Sabbath, remember what each other looks like, and begin again.  P.S., I really love how my husband looks, and it’s nice to have an extended-hours-viewing of him. This week will truly be wonderful and it’s only just begun.

On a Leon note, he’s been full of hilarity lately. But are you surprised?  David called him into the living room yesterday and he came running in, stopped in full ninja pose (with his chubby hands poised in flat paddle like palms, eying David out of the corner of his eye) and said “I’m here battle warrior”.  I think he could live at war and be in seventh heaven.  He randomly, on numerous occasions walks up to David and begins punching and kicking him repetitively. I guess you could safely say that battling him is not my strong suit.  It’s not really even a suit I own.  Needless to say, he loves having dad home.  He also loves one of our neighboring families, to pieces!!!  Each and every day he says, “can I go to the new JJ’s house”.  New, because he met a JJ in NY and is quite confused that people can share names.  (Thus why when seeing Star Wars called bub, Uncle Skywalker.  Or when he heard a Kings of Leon song come on at Grammies house this spring said, “Kings of Me”!) The funny part is he calls all three of their younger boys JJ. this week he is figuring it out a bit, but until now, JJ works for them all.  They are a wonderful family of 4 boys and are on a pedestal in Leon’s little world.  (maybe it’s partially from the fact that they have boxes of “guys” that Leon loves to play with, or the fact that playing with boys is a far superior event than playing with girls) O Leon.  Today in the car he said, “I’ve got a reary good idea about getting me a toy”.  He’s also been sitting on the toilet and is eagerly telling us that he did a reary good toot in there.  Not exactly what we mean by potty training, but at least he is sitting on the potty.  It’s a start for sure.

Well, I am off to enjoy my night.  Hope your day is splendid.

Bep

Leon's buddy Jonathan, the youngest of the Blackman family.

I’m a two faced mother..

In Landing on October 13, 2011 at 8:06 pm

I am sure you feel the same way at times, but seriously, life is craziness.  Most days lately, I think to myself, “what have I done today?”.  The days are long, sort of tiring, and mothering definitely is not for those faint of heart.  At least my “mothering” (my methods of raising these munchkins of mine) isn’t for the faint of heart, thoughtI feel faint most days.  Let’s just say that small people have a way of putting big people through the ringer.  They also have the ability to make one question if ones self is in fact, two faced.  One minute you are telling them, you want to eat them for lunch, and could squish the living day lights out of them.  The next, you are wishing you could resign your current position (one of those job resignations that takes place with much shouting,emotion, and most often tears) and find a new job.  Today was one of those days.  Let’s just say the day was bi-polar.  I had a lovely morning, celebrating my dear friend Jamie’s 34th birthday at none other than our beloved, Cafe Moka.  I then conquered the mountain of grocery shopping, which, that alone makes me want to stand in an auditorium receiving rounds and rounds of applause…SIDE NOTE: We should have a mother’s festival, to just celebrate mothering successes.  You know, how many loads of laundry one has folded in a day, how many poops have been changed in an hour, how much money was saved grocery shopping etc.  Want to?  We can talk about that later…. I called, I think, 3 people to be exact to share how excited I was at my grocery savings.  It was a grand success, and the gracious older gentleman who helped us out said, “you be blessed now, ya hear” as he left us.  I’d say that finished up a rather perfect morning.  This afternoon was an entirely different story.  Between screaming children, hauling all my hefty bags of groceries in from our half way around the world-parking spot, and the two hour nap battle with Leon for the 2nd time this week, you would think I had gone mental.  How does my fiery little red head, who is only two, might I add, have such an ability to inside me out?  Phew.  I wish I knew.  I was rather frustrated to put it in kinder, milder terms.  On top of it all, no nap, no work out, and no clean house.  My two hours were filled with lifting a 34 lbs child back into the pack and play an innumerable amount of times.  It also involved many a swift taps on the butt, and intense lecturing. (the kind of course a 2 year old mind can grapple with)  It was exasperating.  Poor husband got home to a rather frazzled and weary wife.  He kindly let me go and have some alone time and ate pbj’s for dinner with the kids. I feel more sane now.  Mothering, who would have known?  And mothering during law school, I’m glad I didn’t know.

On a whole separate subject, but tightly intertwined, I have been thinking about a clean house. Who the heck gets to enjoy a clean house?  No one really.  It’s also quite exasperating.  If you review the day, and its happenings, you will find most of it is spent messing things up.  You awake from an unkempt bed, to change unkempt diapers, which intern leave piles of pi’s, undies, etc. around the once tidy floor.  You then proceed to the very tidy kitchen, to send it into disarray, and so forth and so forth.  By dinner time, if the kitchen wasn’t crazy enough, you proceed to completely frazzle it by dirtying every single pot you own and a half an hour later when you have consumed delicacies, leave that pig pen to make the bathroom a mess with bath time.  You then proceed to pick the entire house back up, placing it on its two feet again.  Finally it is clean, it looks and smells nice, and it is a beautiful sight to behold.  You are so exhausted by now, that you crawl into that perfectly made bed and bid farewell to the day.  My discovery is,  no one really  gets to enjoy it when it’s clean except of course itself.  It doesn’t seem fair to me. Maybe I should try to enjoy the disarray more.   If only that were a real possibility.

Hope your life is a little more sane than mine,

Missing you dearly, as always,

Bep


If the suit fits, wear it…

In Landing on September 28, 2011 at 11:55 am

I had one of those moments when life is put in perspective.  In those moments I always wish this new found perspective had come sooner.  Its as if someone takes you up above the clouds.  It’s in that up above place when things that seemed so heavy suddenly feel lighter and things that seemed enormous suddenly feel tiny.  It was Regent’s 25 year anniversary of the Law School this month.  They hosted a 600 + person dinner in honor of the anniversary with keynote speaker, Justice Samuel Alito. I should have been excited to hear such a great man speak, but honestly, I was more excited to get fancied up and go out on the town, alone, with my man.  While he was speaking, it was as if the world stood still for me and I realized just how great a man I am married to, how humbling it is to be called on such a journey, and maybe, for the first time in a while, excited for what the future holds, not only for David, but for me.  I think the past few months have, if gently put, bogged me down.  In the midst of some of the hardest months of my life, I had most definitely lost sight of the bigger picture. My heart has been in a mess, and in such a mess that I felt I might never see clearly why we are here.  Thankfully, I think I caught a much needed glimpse of why we are here.  It’s not merely a good idea, or a bad idea, or ants in our pants that put us here in this place called Virginia Beach, but the hand of Almighty God.  I know David will be used to do great things.  What exactly I do not know.  But this I do know, things will be altered, lives will be changed, people will be defended, and justice will be preserved.  That is why we are here.  For now it might look like a mountain with things I may or may not be ready to face.  But in light of eternity, it’s only a moment here.  I was reminded of that again later this week in a Law Wives bible study. ( A Study in which I sat through as an absolute mess inside listening to ladies that seem in a whole class above me, full of grace for the season at hand.  But that is a different story altogether).  I will just say again the revelation I am letting sink in: In light of Eternity, this season is but a moment.  And, if the suit fits, in our case, we should wear it.

With contemplation,

Bep

Clotted cream…

In Landing, Uncategorized on September 22, 2011 at 7:48 am

Molly has been in town for 2 full days and 1 late night and it feels like she’s been here forever.  Forever is a very good thing in this case. If you were to look at the sides of my arms and legs you would know she has been here from the many bruises that have appeared.  Many a side jabs and pinches are a part of any, and I repeat ANY little excitement in life, for Molly. So glad she is here. I have eaten far too many sweets (again I will blame this on Mols) while she has been here, and I really don’t care.  We have worked out enough to compensate for the goodies, I think.  We made scones with clotted cream.  If you wonder what that is, it is very much what the name suggests.  Something deliciously good that probably clots something it’s not supposed to and full of creamy goodness.  Thank God for its invention somewhere in England. As we always say,” sometimes you have to say poop, and do what you want”.  In this case eating too many scones is our “do what we want”.  Speaking of poop.  We were all loaded up ready to head out of the house the other day.  It’s quite a walk to the car from our apartment, so we (meaning me, Leon’s not quite at the state of helping yet, unless of course you count the fact I don’t have to carry him to the car as well, as helping) normally bring as much as possible at once so as to avoid multiple trips.  In this case, I had diaper bags, Solie, Duggle, was pushing a stroller, and had a large bag of poop filled diapers.  Leon matter-of-factly said, “Are we bringing our poop with us?” Good question.  I answered a big “No”, and tried to explain that we were simply disposing of it.  The unfortunate part, while contemplating that question is, I have come to realize I most often do bring my poop with me.  Funny how kids make you think of these stare-you-in-the face things in life.  I don’t want to be someone that carries around the poop in life

.  I don’t want to harbor offenses, let little things ruin my day, let nonsensical things become far too important, or simply wear myself out with the weight of things I am not supposed to carry.  I have been carrying around too much of this so called “poop”.  Stopping and smelling the roses so quickly can become something you once did.  When is the last time I have done so?  Not exactly sure.  My problem is upon realizing this hard truth, that I again, rather than identifying and letting go, add one more frustration to the sack and carry it around for a while.  I wish it were easier said than done, this so called process of de-poopifying ones life.  I have decided to start focusing on the “done” part of this equation and allow God to help me loose my grip on the not so pleasant things in life.  This adjustment into law school has been an eternity of a 5 week stretch.  But, none the less, we are 5 weeks in and I am still breathing, still enjoying life to a certain level and beginning to love some things about Virginia Beach.  There are still many things I do not love, but that is the poop sack I will do my best to dispose of for now.  One day, I will again live somewhere with an edged lawn.  Until then, I will learn to look at jagged, grass grown sidewalks, and smile.

Love,

Bep


a jiggle bed and a hair cut…

In Landing on September 6, 2011 at 5:15 pm

I forgot to tell you several funny stories. Story One: I was trying to take a nap the other day.  David had just left for school, after lunch, and both boys had fallen asleep at the same time.  A complete novelty around here.  It was my chance to nap, also a novelty around here.  I was in heaven.  I hadn’t been laying down more than 15 min when I was slowly shaken from my almost dreamlike state.  In a not so coherent state, I was very out of sorts.  “Had David snuck back in to play a trick on me?” I thought to myself.  He didn’t seem in the mood to be playing a trick, but what else could it be.  I sat up slowly, looked around the bed, but did not find David on hands and knees shaking the bed.  “It must be the neighbors washer, off kilter”, was my next logical thought. Then I reminded myself that their washer isn’t in the master bedroom upstairs.  Well, whatever it was, I was now awake.  Oh well, my glorious nap of fifteen minutes was now over.  On to the next thing.  Soon my phone rang.  “Did I feel the earthquake?” I heard myself repeat.  “Yes, yes I did, I guess”.  Ha!  I should have thought of that. Earthquake Shmirkquake!

Story Two: I was greeted by my dear husband the other day telling me that a classmate of his was coming over for a hair cut on Sunday at 5pm.  Now, I do cut hair as you know, and have cut quite a few hairs for being a un-trained snipper.  Having said that, guy hair cuts are a rarity and something reserved for someone I know quite well.  Not only must I know them quite well, but this individual must also meet the criteria of being someone whose life would not be ruined, if a hair cut were to go awry.  This so called classmate didn’t meet either of these criteria. David thought it was an easy way to earn some extra money and for a half an hours time, no big deal.  O Joy.   David convinced me that he was not a picky guy and that I would do a great job.  I was not so sure of this.  Let me preface, that our clippers, are as dull as a plastic disposable knife and successfully cut 3 hairs at a time.  When my “client” walked in with a head of THICK dark hair I knew I was in for it.  He was from “Luhl Vuhl” Kentucky.  What I have always pronounced, Louisville.  He was a southerner for sure.  He let me know he used to get a “high and tight”, (I just nodded, assuming that meant a military cut) but that he was thinking of maybe a 4 for now on the sides and in the back.  To sum the story up, my poor “client” was sweating to death under my old sheet drapery, complete with a clothes pin clasp.  Poor client.  This 1/2 hour cut turned into an hour and ten minute cut, the entire head, might I add, (a 4 on the back and sides, to remind you) by hand, due to our clippers failing their function.  I was nervous as can be.  He said he liked the hair cut, but we don’t know him at all.  He may have just been giving Southern compliments.  It’s hard to tell.  I guess we will find out if he really liked it when he asks for a hair cut again. I may not oblige anyhow, we will see.  I do get to go to coffee a few times this week, which is wonderful, and I have successfully (fingers crossed) given the most difficult hair cut I have ever given up to this point.  Phew.  David is rethinking his eager volunteering of my hair cutting skills.  He is realizing that his time is precious and that the hour and ten minutes of children watching whilst I was giving the hair cut, is a lot of study time that he waved goodbye to.  I am re-thinking getting new clippers.  Both are good thoughts.

You have to smile,

Bep

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